


Miles Apart

by SirJoker



Category: Doctor Who (2005), Doctor Who RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Press and Tabloids, Strained Relationships, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-08
Updated: 2016-10-15
Packaged: 2018-08-13 21:36:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 16,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7987060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SirJoker/pseuds/SirJoker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They were thousands of miles apart but they were constantly on each other’s minds.<br/>They were sure that a small mistake wouldn't lead to so much attention.<br/>They were wrong, and because of it, hiding their true feelings became more difficult.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally a one-shot but I've decided to turn it into a multi-chapter story.  
> Enjoy.  
> P.S. This is purely fictional.

Jenna. 

That was the first thing that came into his mind when he woke up. It wasn’t the time, filming or what he had to do for the day. No, it was her. Peter rolled over in bed and squinted his eyes, checking the time displayed by the alarm clock. 04:30. 

He had to be up early for filming today but decided to continue lying in bed, massaging his temple. Why on earth would she be on his mind at time of day, let alone at half past four in the morning? 

It occurred to him that Jenna had left Doctor Who, progressing her career further with Victoria and that they hadn’t seen each other in a while as they were both busy with their respective careers. 

Peter was happy for her. He genuinely was, but he misses her. He missed waking up in the morning, eager to arrive at the filming location or on set and wait for her. He missed acting like a complete dork with her. 

Not that he had anything to complain about Pearl. She was a great actress but Jenna meant so much more to him. She was his best friend. 

Best friend. Peter kept telling himself that but what was the point of lying? 

He had thought that it was just a simple crush that would fade away at some point but it ended up sticking around, even after Jenna left. At a point, he was sure it wasn’t a just a crush anymore. He knew what he felt and there was nothing he could do about it except ignore it. That was the best option for everyone’s sake.

However, that doesn’t mean he wasn’t allowed to feel a bit of jealousy when he saw her cosying up with her Victoria co-star. 

Peter had seen several episodes of the new TV series and as much as he was happy for Jenna, all he wanted to do was hold her in his arms or maybe twirl her just like he did during filming for series 9. 

He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, reminding himself not to fall asleep as he had to be on set early. What was he thinking? He was clearly thirty years older than her and here was in bed, thinking about her. 

A question suddenly popped in his head. Does she feel the same way about him? It was a thought that had been in his mind for a while but never answered. 

Peter couldn’t tell. His feelings for Jenna were complex enough but he couldn’t help but wonder. 

She recalled the memory of when he found out that a fan had asked her if she had a crush on him and she avoided the question like the plague, telling people about their first meeting. 

He had teased her about it and in a joking manner, asked if she indeed had a crush on him. In a way, the question was still left hanging in the air. She didn’t give him a straight answer.

That was the last time they had texted each other and it was, what, weeks ago. 

Peter reached for his phone and contemplated whether he should send her a message just to say hi and ask her how she’s doing. Just a friend checking up on his friend. 

He had read the news that she was in the US, attending a comic-con so there was definitely a time difference of about eight hours. He stared at the smartphone, pondering, unaware that thousands of miles away, Jenna was thinking the same thing. 

She was in her hotel room, staring at the phone lying on the bed innocently. 

The last time they had chat was when he had found out about the whole ‘crush question from a fan’ thing and that was almost a month ago. After that, she didn’t have much time to text him like she regularly would back when she was still with Doctor Who, sending him emojis and terrible jokes just for the sake of it. She missed those times.  
  
But more than ever, she misses Peter. 

Sometimes, she wished things were different, less complicated and that he was younger, not that she didn’t like him the way he was but things would be less of complex.  
The memory of the interview with the Guardian played in Jenna’s head. She was speaking the truth when she had said Peter Capaldi was in her head. 

The closest she could get to telling him she loved him was during comic-con where she had announced it in front of a large crowd but it had a completely different meaning than what everyone – including Peter had thought… or maybe he knew. She may never find out.

Grabbing her phone, Jenna unlocked it and searched for his name in the contacts list. She paused before she began typing, thumb hovering above the screen. The last thing she wanted to do was bother him. He was probably still sleeping. She could always text him another time. Setting the phone down on the bed, she grabbed the remote, deciding to take her mind elsewhere. 

Peter on the other hand, was thinking of the same thing. He didn’t want to suddenly intrude her. He held the smartphone in his hand before making a final decision by placing it back on the nightstand. He could always ask her to have lunch with him or something once his schedule wasn’t so hectic or once filming was over. 

He tossed the covers aside and climb out of bed, walking into the bathroom. 

The phones, one on the nightstand and the other on a pillow, did not buzz or ring for their owners thought the other didn’t want to be interrupted but their thoughts still circled around one another, even though they were miles apart.


	2. Chapter 2

Filming for series 10 had finally ended and Peter was glad to finally be at home, able to wake up late, do as he pleased without worrying about oversleeping or being late. As much as he enjoyed being the Doctor, he was more than happy to be on a break. 

However, he never made the effort to return to London. Even if he did, which he had done twice during the filming, it was because he wanted to check up on his daughter.

At the moment, and hopefully temporarily, he wasn’t entirely sure what to do or say. Before this whole mess, talking to his wife was easy, natural. He didn’t feel the need to think so hard. He knew what he wanted to say to her. 

Peter stared at the open luggage on the mattress, clutching a black t-shirt in his hands. 

Doctor Who had been nominated for several awards and he was asked to attend the event. 

He had been to countless award shows but the difference this time is that Jenna would most likely be present as well and that was just the tip of the iceberg. 

They hadn’t seen, let alone spoken to each other since comic-con and it felt strange as they were so used to texting each other for the past two years but their respective careers got in the way. Him with Doctor Who and her with Victoria. 

Placing the t-shirt inside the suitcase, he then zipped it up and set it on the floor before sitting on the edge of the bed. 

The driver would arrive in less than half an hour so he had a bit of time to think. Should he send her a quick text, asking if would attend the event? It sounded like a stupid thing to do. Of course she would be there, right? Why would she not go? 

Peter held his smartphone, fiddling it with his right hand before he snorted. Funny how he was hesitating to do something as simple as texting Jenna. Months ago, he would have done it without much thought. 

Screw it. One text wouldn’t hurt. 

Fate had other plans however, as his phone buzzed. The screen immediately illuminated to show the details of who had texted him – Jenna.

_Are you planning to attend the award show? ___

If it were up to him, he would rather stay in Cardiff but nonetheless, he began typing a response.

_Yes, your Majesty. Driver will be here in less than 20 mins. ___

He tapped the send button and waited, chewing on his thumb.

_See you next week then, Doctor :) ___

Peter’s lips curved into a small smile. He pocketed the phone and rose from the bed.

Things were still the same with them, judging by the conversation but he couldn’t shake the feeling that something about their relationship had shifted, aside from his feelings for her. Then again, they were always there even before she had left. 

However, his attitude seemed to have changed ever since she left. He felt tired a lot, less energetic and he would rather spend time in his apartment than attending social events. He had initially blame it on his age but the longer he stuck to that theory, the lesser it was true. He went to the gym and had started eating a balanced diet but neither did much to counter it. 

Peter snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the sound of a vehicle entering the apartment compound. The driver had arrived, it would seem as he took a quick glance out the window. 

Sliding his messenger bag over his shoulder, he reached for the suitcase and strode out of the bedroom, closing the door. 

The journey to London didn’t feel that long, strangely, and the only thing he did in the car was admiring the countryside and he had only realized he was finally home when the driver got out of the car. 

The vehicle drove off and Peter stood in front of his home. Elaine would surely be surprised by his sudden presence and judging by the empty porch, his daughter was out. 

He exhaled through his nose before grabbing his suitcase and walked up the steps to the front door. 

“Cissy? That was quick. I thought you were going…” he heard his wife spoke as she descended from the staircase. “Oh,” was all she managed when Elaine saw him standing in the hallway. Her facial expression changed from that of amusement to neutral. 

“Hi,” was all he managed, almost in a whisper. 

His wife was silent for a while before she said softly, “You didn’t tell me you were coming home.”

“It was a last minute thing. They wanted me to be present at the award show,” he replied, passing her on the stairs, one hand carrying his luggage, the other making sure his messenger doesn’t slip off his shoulder. “And then I’ll return to Cardiff.”

A look of disappointment flashed through her face. “Alright.”

He stood on the last step, mentally kicking himself for sounding so cold but before he could say anything else, Elaine was gone, disappearing into the kitchen. 

Their relationship had been strained since the filming for series 10 began. He had spent more and more time in Wales, only sending his wife a text every now and then. They had grown apart and there was no one to be blamed expect him. 

The last time he returned home, they got into a huge argument.

_“You’ve been moping around like this ever since she left!”_

_“Elaine, I’ve told you before, I’m just tired. The interviews, the events since the past few months are exhausting,” Peter replied weakly._

_“Do you honestly think I’m that blind and stupid?! We rarely talk to each other and you’re always up in Wales – avoiding me, avoiding us… it’s because of her isn’t it?”_

_“What are you talking about?! There is nothing between me and Jenna! I promise.”_

_“Oh, please, Peter. Why lie to me, especially to yourself. I’ve known you for so long. I do believe that you didn’t do anything stupid but… the way you look at her – the way you talk -” Elaine broke into tears and locked herself in the bedroom that night.  
___

After the argument, he was forced to sleep on the couch, something that hadn’t happened since forever. The first and last time it happened was when he had forgotten to clean up the house while Elaine was away. 

She was furious with him when she saw the state of the house, resulting in him using the couch as a sleeping place but things were simpler back then and when he woke up the next morning, he found that she was sleeping next to him on the small, uncomfortable sofa. 

A sad smile played on his lips as the memory played in his mind. 

Peter tossed his bags on the bed before sitting on the edge of it, his face in his hands. Here he was, an old man, having feelings for his former co-star who is almost 30 years younger than him while trying to figure out what to do about his strained relationship with his wife. 

Unknown to Peter, and despite what the tabloids suggest, Jenna’s personal life in recent months hadn’t been that great either.


	3. Chapter 3

It had taken a lot of courage for Jenna to send the text message. They had barely talked to one another and she was missing her best friend dearly. 

The past few months in her life had been a complete hectic, attending one show after another on a daily basis, promoting Victoria and keeping the pretence that she was dating her co-star, Tom because everyone had thought it would be a good PR stunt. 

It was beginning to take a toll on her, especially the pretending bit as if she was falling heads over heels for him. Sure, Tom was nice but she just wasn’t attracted to him at all. 

Jenna snorted. If only Peter wasn’t married, she would have happily confessed her feelings to him but reality can sometimes be harsh and cruel. The last thing she wanted to do was ruin his life. He was clearly happily married so why would he need to be looking for love elsewhere. 

Or at least, that was what she had told herself ever since she realized she was attracted to her Doctor Who co-star. 

And in a week from now, they would be reunited. She was both excited and anxious about seeing him again. Excited because, well, both of them are good friends who haven’t seen each other in recent months and nervous, because something had changed between them. They didn’t text each other as often as they used to and she couldn’t help but think about the question a fan had thrown at her during comic-con. 

The words rang in her head like a mantra.

_“Do you have a crush on Peter Capaldi?” ___

While she had successfully changed the subject, she had failed to hide her emotions and her body language clearly gave it away.

How was she ever going to face him without recalling that incident? 

Eventually, the night of the awards ceremony arrived and Peter was just getting ready to leave the house, a black vehicle parked by the driveway. 

He took one last look in the mirror before leaving the bedroom, striding down the stairs and saw Elaine waiting for him in the living room. 

“I should be back after midnight,” he said casually. 

She nodded and rose from her seat, setting the magazine she was reading aside. She walked up to him and fixed his tie. “Don’t have too much fun,” she murmured lightly. 

“I’ll try not to,” he then bent down and kissed her cheek before leaving without uttering another word. He did not look back as he stepped into the car and a few moments later, it drove off as his wife watched silently from one of the glass windows. 

Jenna reminded herself to keep on smiling as she was standing in front of dozens of cameras, flashes going off every second. While she was used to this kind of thing, she was dreading the questions reporters were throwing at her. 

“Jenna, is it true you and Tom are moving in together to a new place?”

“Some say that your relationship with Tom Hughes is just a PR stunt. Would you like to comment on that?”

“When did you and Richard Madden call it quits?”

She had wished Peter was with her. She knew he would be able to say something witty and funny and make her forget about the drama. 

Questions were still being asked but she merely stayed silent, beaming, hoping that there was another celebrity that the press could hound instead of her. 

From the corner of her eye, she saw a familiar figure stepping out of a black vehicle and Jenna’s smile grew wider. While most of the cameras were on her, some were on Peter the moment he set foot on the red carpet. 

He saw her standing in the distance and beamed. 

Hugging was the first thing that they would do whenever they saw each other and this time was no different. 

“I’ve missed you,” she murmured without thinking, distracted by the bright flashes. 

She felt him tighten his arms around her. “Missed you too, Jen.”

They pulled away, eyes still locked into one another before Peter quickly broke the contact. 

Once they were inside the building and away from the press, the two broke into quiet laughter. 

Jenna was the first to speak. “So, how have you been?”

She had been expecting him to tell her that he had been doing great, that everything was fine, he’s happy to be home but the look in his eyes told her the exact opposite and the smile on her face dropped slowly. 

The sadness in his eyes contradicted the small smile playing on his lips. He shrugged at first, hands in his pockets. She placed a hand on his arm, not sure what to say so she merely Jenna merely caressed the sleeve of his jacket with her thumb. 

She was about to speak but was interrupted when all guests were ushered into the hall as the show was about to begin. 

She decided that she could ask him later as she took a seat next to him. 

If Peter was completely honest with himself, he felt a bit nervous – not because of the ceremony but because there was a voice at the back of his head that kept telling him Elaine wanted to say more than just ‘don’t have too much fun’. She knew that Jenna would be present but hadn’t mentioned it and he wasn’t sure it that was a good or bad sign.  
  
It could be good since it is a hint that she isn’t bothered by the thought of him spending time with Jenna or it could be bad since it meant that she was ignoring the problem but that doesn’t sound like the Elaine he knew. No, surely it is the former. 

The lights in the hall dimmed, indicating that the award show would start shortly. 

Peter took a glance at Jenna but she caught him and he immediately looked down at his hands before looking at her again. 

“Peter…”

“I saw an episode of Victoria. You were amazing,” he murmured sincerely, earning a chuckle from her. 

“You won’t get away that easily, Capaldi.”

And he didn’t. 

The award show lasted for about two and a half hours before it ended with both Peter and Jenna leaving empty handed but they were far from disappointed. 

While most guests were heading into a different section of the building for the after-party, Peter thought about calling it a day. He wasn’t one for parties to begin with. 

However, Jenna knew him too well. 

“You’re thinking about leaving, aren’t you?” she asked cheekily, poking his arm. 

“Ten points for you, Jen,” he replied, laughing. “You should go have fun, though. Don’t let me ruin it.”

She raised a brow. “And who says I prefer mingling with other celebrities over you?”

Her facial expression then changed to that of a serious one. “Peter, what’s going on? Are you alright?”

Jenna saw the same sadness in his eyes as she did before the award show started. She felt her heart breaking over such a devastating look. 

“Not here, not when we’re surrounded by people.”

“Ok, so where do you suggest we go? A café? Restaurant? I don’t think any are opened at this time of night.”

He grinned at her suddenly. “I’ve been here countless times.”

“Oh, there you go, he’s showing off,” she joked. 

“No, no, what I meant was… well, just follow me,” Peter grabbed Jenna’s hand before approaching the door to the staircase. “The rooftop has a beautiful view of London.”

Even if he didn’t mention the view, she would have followed him, regardless. 

Jenna beamed, gripping his hand as he led her up the stairs to the rooftop.


	4. Chapter 4

Peter was true to his words when he had told her that the rooftop had a stunning view of London. 

Jenna smiled broadly at him as she drank in the sight of the city, their hands still intertwined with one another. The cold night air brushed her face lightly, causing a few strands of her hair to blow in the wind. 

“You’re weren’t kidding when you told me about the view.”

He grinned at her. “I am a man of my word.”

“So,” she began, letting go of his hand and twirling around to face him. “Spit it out, Capaldi,” she said with a playful tone. 

Peter made a mocking face, placing a hand on his heart. “So bold and direct, aren’t you, Jenna – or should I say Queen Victoria?”

Jenna merely rolled her eyes at his dramatic reaction, unable to prevent herself from beaming. 

His gaze then changed to that of a tender one. “Before that,” he uttered and took off his jacket, wrapping it around her as she was clearly shivering from the cold. Always the gentleman, he was. 

“Thank you,” she murmured, wrapping the jacket tightly around her. 

He merely nodded before hiding his hands in the pockets of his pants, hair ‘blowing majestically’ as Jenna had taken to calling it whenever she saw Peter’s hair blowing in the wind. The sight of him made her legs feel weak but she had to get a grip of herself. 

The man standing in front of her was happily married - someone she will never have. 

“So, where do you want me to start?” Peter asked, snapping her out of her thoughts. 

“I… You looked… When I asked you how you’ve been, you looked… devastated.”

He walked towards the railings, resting both his arms on it, his back facing her before he spoke. “I suppose you could say that things aren’t working as smoothly as they should.”

Jenna furrowed her brows, not understanding what he meant. “I don’t understand. I thought Doctor Who is your dream job?”

He craned his neck to quickly glance at her. “It’s not Doctor Who. That is doing fine. No complaints.”

It then dawned to her what he was talking about. Why else would he look like a kicked puppy? She felt her heart constrict at the thought it. Slowly, she approached him and placed a hand on his arm. 

“I’m sorry… I don’t know what else to say. I mean -”

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault,” he interrupted her, another sad smile playing on his lips. “It has been strained for… a while now and I’m to be blamed.”

Jenna wasn’t sure if she should say something but she felt the need to tell him it couldn’t be all his fault. She gripped the jacket tighter to her. “Peter, you are the kindest, most considerate and nicest man I’ve ever met – you can’t just take all the blame. I don’t understand – you and Elaine always work things out.”

“Don’t worry about it, Jenna. It’ll be fine – I’ll manage somehow. Anyway, enough about me, you and this Tom Hughes seem to be all over the papers,” he said, trying to sound casual. 

Jenna let out a laugh at the mention of her co-star, confusing Peter. 

“I’m sorry, Jen. Did I say something funny?” he asked. 

“You don’t actually believe the rubbish they write, do you?”

He raised his brows. “Of course not! But you are dating him… right?” he stated, turning around so that his back was leaning against the railings. 

She shook her head in response, looking out into the city. “Nope. Tom is nice but he’s not my type. The whole relationship thing is just a PR stunt for Victoria.”

“Ah, so you’re still with Richard, then.”

Again, she shook her head and this time, she was on the verge of tears, remembering how bad the relationship ended. 

Peter’s playful smile disappeared as soon as he saw the look on her face. “Jen, I’m sorry – I-”

She sniffed. “No. One day he texted me and said that things just weren’t working out between us and it would be best if we go our separate ways. I agree that I haven’t been able to commit because of work but it hurts.”

Jenna felt him place both his hands on her shoulder so that she would face him. Tears were streaming down her cheeks but she felt one of his hands leaving her shoulder. He was wiping her tears with his thumb. 

“You can use the sleeve of my jacket to wipe the tears if you’d like,” he murmured jokingly before bringing her closer to him and kissing her forehead. 

She laughed at his joke, resting her head against his chest, hearing the steady beating of his heart. Jenna closed her eyes and wrapped one arm around him, the other still gripping his jacket. 

They stood still on the rooftop for what seemed like minutes and Peter didn’t mind. He rested his chin on her head, waiting for Jenna to calm down. Eventually, her sobs died and he glanced at her. 

“All better?” 

She nodded silently wiping her eye with her hand. “I’m sorry but I… um… wiped my eyes with your jacket earlier and your shirt is a bit wet too.”

He burst into small laughter and she joined in. “That’s fine, Jen. No big deal.”

They were still wrapped in each other’s arms and any passer by from one of the buildings would have thought it was merely a couple trying to get some private moments at first glance. 

The cold night air was still making itself present but none of them minded the chill. 

“You know, you still look beautiful, even without your make-up,” he said without thinking, his mouth seemed to have a mind of its own. 

The remark had caused Jenna to smile broadly, albeit a shy one. “Well, you don’t look too bad yourself, Doctor. Your majestic hair is still majestic.”

Peter didn’t utter a single word. Instead, he placed a hand on her cheek, wiping away the last drop of tear on her face. 

Both knew where they were headed. Their minds told them to stop, providing rational arguments but the facts were shut out as their hearts were telling them to just go for it. 

Maybe it was because they were away from the public, alone on a rooftop overlooking London where they could just be themselves again. Maybe it was because they couldn’t hide their feelings any longer, especially not when they were so close to one another. Whatever the reason, they decided to follow their hearts that night. 

Peter bent down and captured Jenna’s lips in a tender kiss. It was sweet and gentle but it only lasted for a few moments. 

Jenna was the first to pull away, eyes half-closed. Peter still had his hand on her cheek, caressing it lightly. For her, one kiss wasn’t enough and so, she pulled him down for another. 

The second kiss was so much more different than the first. It was passionate, hungry. Everything they had bottled up was being poured in. 

Peter’s senses came crashing down on his mind suddenly and he pulled away, a look of horror and confusion washed over his face. Jenna didn’t fare any better. 

The fact that they had crossed the line was what kept repeating in her mind. 

“I’m sorry – I shouldn’t – I’m so sorry, Peter.”

He shook his head, swallowing the lump in his throat. “I kissed you first.”

He ran a hand over his hair. He had kissed Jenna. It wasn’t just a chaste kiss. No. He snogged her twice in one night but that wasn’t the worst part. 

The worst part was that he wanted to kiss her again. He wanted more than just a kiss and he could tell she wanted the same thing too. 

Peter gazed at her. Her face was flushed and she was breathing heavily. “I’m sorry, Jenna,” he managed. “I shouldn’t have kissed you.”

Jenna’s mind was racing with so many thoughts that she was speechless. The only thing she could do was hand over his jacket. “I should go,” she murmured, her voice nearly cracking. 

He waited for her to shut the door to the rooftop before cussing out in the open. What had he just done?

In the building next to where the award show took place, a security guard by the name of Hunter Davis, who was doing his rounds in the office building, saw the whole ordeal and had taken photos of them with his smartphone. He knew he would get a lot of money from the papers and gossip magazines. Of course, he would give the pictures to the highest bidder. Hunter Davis couldn’t wait to call every single newspaper agency in London.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now I can't really stop writing this.  
> But seriously, uni will commence next week so my updates will most likely be scheduled. Updates are expected to be released during the weekends (and depending how busy I am).  
> I do have plans to write a Whouffaldi one-shot and another Colepaldi one after completing this story. Plus, updating Fate's Game: Snippets. 
> 
> Ok, enough about my plans. Here's chapter 5.

He had immediately gone home after what had occurred between him and Jenna. He had tried looking for her when she left the rooftop but she had most likely went home. There was no good reason for her to be mingling about with other celebrities. 

Peter unlocked the door to his house quietly. It was half past midnight and the only source of light from within the house came from the wall lamp by the stairs. Elaine was probably already asleep. 

He shut the door slowly before heading to the kitchen and switching on the lights and helping himself to a glass of water. His throat suddenly felt dry and he felt anxious, the incident on the rooftop still having an effect on him. 

Setting the glass in the sink, he closed his eyes and sighed before taking off his jacket and loosening his tie. Everything suddenly just didn’t feel right. He reasoned that it was due to what had happened. Maybe a good night’s rest would help him ease the stress. 

Peter made his way up the stairs and stood in front of the bedroom door, hand inches away from the doorknob. Could he really face his wife after he had crossed the line with Jenna? Sure, it was merely a kiss – well, he kissed her twice but still, it wasn’t like he slept with her. Then again, Peter was a man who would never in his life cheat on his wife. At least not on purpose. 

The whole thing happened unintentionally.

No. He knew what he was doing. There was no point justifying or lying to himself. He had made a mistake but it was a mistake he couldn’t bring himself to regret. The feel of Jenna’s lips, the way she caressed his hair. The thought of it made his body tingle. 

He straightened his back and twisted the door knob, slowly pushing the door. 

The lights were off and he was right – Elaine was asleep, her back facing him. He gently shut the door and placed his jacket and tie on the chair in one corner of the room, making sure to make as minimal noise as possible. 

Peter didn’t move from his spot in the centre of the room. He felt guilty for betraying his wife, for wanting Jenna. He couldn’t bring himself to sleep next to her that night as he was guilt-ridden. 

He decided to sleep downstairs in the living room, on the long sofa. 

Carefully, he pulled the door open and took one last look at his sleeping wife before closing the door.

Unknown to him, Elaine was awake the whole time. She had been waiting for him to come home but his action shocked her. Never had he let her sleep by herself in their entire marriage before. She couldn’t help but silently cry herself to sleep. Something had clearly happened. 

Jenna didn’t take things any better either. She was on the verge of tears when she had left Peter on the rooftop and the only sensible thing for her to do was leave before people started asking why her eyes were blotched and red. 

The moment she reached home, she retreated to her bedroom, trying to make sense of what had happened between her and Peter. 

She had snogged him. Twice. On a rooftop overlooking London and what a moment it was. 

And then reality came crashing down on them both. 

He was married. She didn’t want to complicate his marriage even more. 

Jenna was ashamed of herself as well. While she may have done the right thing by using common sense, she doesn’t feel an ounce of regret. She enjoyed the kiss, especially the second one. How their bodies were pressed against one another, the smell of his aftershave and cologne intoxicating her. It all just seemed romantic at the time. It was as if they were just two people expressing their love for one another after hiding it for so long. 

Maybe she should call or text him tomorrow morning. They needed to sort out over what happened. Talk over things properly. They couldn’t just leave it like that, pretending as if nothing happened. 

She pulled out her phone from her purse and held it her hands. Should she text him at this time of the night? Had he returned home already? What if he was already asleep? Lots of questions were running through her mind. 

She twirled the electronic device in her hand. She should wait until morning. 

Yes, contacting Peter sounded like a good idea. Let everything cool down a bit. 

Morning came and Peter was still dozing off on the sofa, still wearing the clothes he wore to the award show. The crisp white shirt was now wrinkled, the upper part of his shirt unbuttoned and sleeves rolled up. 

Elaine was the first to wake up and when she saw her husband sleeping, she smiled. She had always thought he looked adorable when sleeping on the couch. She was certainly feeling a lot better than she did last night and reasoned that he must have had a good reason to be sleeping in the living room. He would surely tell her. 

Sure, their marriage is currently going through tough times but what marriage doesn’t? They have been married for thirty years and had gone through a lot. It would pass… or at least that was what Elaine told herself. 

She made her way to the kitchen to make tea. It was a habit of hers to have tea before making breakfast, start off the day with a nice beverage. 

While she was filling water into the kettle, her phone buzzed on the table but she ignored it, choosing to focus on her current task rather than checking her phone. 

Once she had set the kettle on the stove, she reached for her phone. Who on earth would contact her at such an early time in morning. 

The sun was barely up and here was her friend, Linda sending her a text message. 

She opened it and read the contents. 

Elaine’s facial expression morphed from amusement to horror and shock after her brain processed the message she was reading. There was even an image attached. 

Being involved the world of show business, she had a lot contacts and one of them was her good friend, Linda Ashworth who worked as an editor for the Daily Mail. 

The image Linda had sent was that of Peter and Jenna kissing on the rooftop. 

Elaine let out a gasp. One that was loud enough to have woken up Peter in a startled state. He jolted from the sofa, hair tousled and he was still half asleep but aware that something was wrong. He could hear his wife sobbing coming from the kitchen and immediately got up. 

“Elaine?”

She was slumped on a chair, one hand holding her smartphone and the other covering her mouth. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. 

When she saw him, she whispered, hurt evident in her voice. “What have you done?”

Peter, who was still a bit dazed from being suddenly woken up, couldn’t fully comprehend what was going on. Did she find out what had occurred the previous night? How did she find out?

She placed the phone on the table, in his direction and he grabbed it.

**_‘Doctor Who Love Affair’ ___******

_‘Doctor Who star, Peter Capaldi was caught kissing his former co-star and Victoria lead, Jenna Coleman on a rooftop in London during the BAFTA after party’ ___

The title was written in large and bold letters, accompanied by a picture of him and Jenna wrapped in each others arms, kissing on the rooftop.

“The Daily Mail is planning to release that today but Linda managed to stall it for a day. They are going to publish it tomorrow, Peter,” she said gravely, wiping her eyes. 

Peter was speechless. No words came out of his mouth as he read the message over and over again. 

At that moment, his phone began buzzing in his pants pocket. He pulled it out and unlocked his phone. There was a message from Jenna.

_‘Is there a chance we could talk?’ ___


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This update is the result of the WiFi in my flat not working for six hours.  
> Enjoy.

Somebody had spotted them that night. Somebody had taken a picture of him and Jenna on the rooftop. Somebody was probably getting a lot of money for selling the picture to the Daily Mail. Somebody was an ass hat. 

But, it wasn’t entirely somebody’s fault that things were slowly getting out of hand. 

Peter stared at the two phones in his hands. He pocketed his phone away, telling himself he can always contact Jenna at a later time. For now, he had a bigger, much bigger issue to deal with. 

He should have known that being alone on the rooftop with a woman he was in love with was a bad idea but it wasn’t the case at that time. It all seemed harmless. All he wanted to do was having a private moment with her and show the view. 

“Well,” Elaine began, snapping him out of his thoughts. “Are you going to stand there all day staring at my phone?”

His blood ran cold at her words. She was clearly furious with him and she had every right to be. He slowly placed the electronic device on the table before licking his lips.  
  
“Last night… it was… an accident,” he said weakly. 

His wife snorted at his explanation, not believing a single word of it. She was angry and hurt. Worst of all, she felt humiliated. 

She wanted to believe him but her mind was in a mess. She knew that Peter was attracted to his former co-star but she ignored it at first, thinking it was just a simple crush that will eventually go away. 

Unfortunately, she had underestimated the issue. After filming for series 9 had ended, she had noticed he wasn’t the same. Peter preferred to lock himself up in his study or play the guitar, barely doing anything during the break. They rarely talked as he would brush her away whenever she reached out to him. It had been like this for almost a year. 

Elaine used to trust her husband completely but now, she wasn’t so sure. 

“I find that hard to believe, Peter!” she snapped. He flinched but she continued. “How long has this been on for?! Did it start after series nine? Is that why you’re in Wales all the time?!”

“Elaine, I promise you, there was-”

“Am I not enough for you?!” she hissed, causing him to freeze. 

Silence fell and the only sound that could be heard was the boiling kettle.

Elaine turned off the stove and waited for him to say something. 

Peter knew he deserved every question and accusation being bombarded at him. He knew he had screwed up and was beginning to panic over the stability of his marriage. They were always able to pull through together but this, this problem was something else. And now, here he stood in the kitchen, shocked, horrified and surprised. 

“Elaine, I love you. Why would you say such a thing?” he said gently, trying to reach for her hand but she took a step back. 

He was telling her the truth. He loves her. He always will. She was his friend, partner, companion and wife who had gone through thick and thin with him. She stuck with him when he was at his lowest, acting as his anchor, keeping him grounded. Of course, he loves her. 

But, at the same time, Peter couldn’t help but fall in love with another woman either. It was unfair for Elaine but he was only a human. He wouldn’t be human if he didn’t have any flaws. 

His wife sniffed. She needed to think clearly. And she needed to do it alone, without interference because at the moment, whenever she looked at Peter, all she felt was betrayal and anger. 

“I need time to think,” she said. “Alone… for now.”

He understood what she meant and nodded weakly. He couldn’t be mad at her for kicking him out, even if it was only temporary. She deserved all the space she needed. She was going to have to deal with the press tomorrow too, once they find out about the scandal. 

“Alright, I will pack my things,” he murmured before leaving her alone in the kitchen. 

After Peter had showered and changed into a fresh set of clothes, he saw his luggage on the mattress, his clothes neatly packed. 

He smiled sadly. 

Elaine was furious with him but she still loves him and she had shown it by packing his clothes since both knew he would do a terrible job at it, stuffing everything into the luggage without a second thought instead of folding them neatly.

His wife waited for him by the door when he walked down the stairs. Her arms crossed as she eyed him like a hawk. He took one last glance at her before walking out and heard the door shut once he reached the car. 

Peter sat in the driver seat and tossed his suitcase at the back before sighing. 

It was at that moment he remembered the text message he received from Jenna. He realised that she had no idea what was about to transpire tomorrow and quickly pulled out his phone. 

He dialled her number and waited for her to answer. 

“Jenna!” he said, a little too loudly. 

“Peter?”

He cleared his throat. “I thought it might be better to call since we really need to go over things.”

There was a short silence on the other end. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

He sighed and closed his eyes. “Yes, I screwed up – just tell me where we can meet.”

He could hear her pace around before she spoke. “The café that’s twenty minutes from my place? You know, the one we used to go to.”

“Yeah, I’ll be there.”

He felt as if she was about to ask him what was going on but she merely said, “Ok, see you there in half an hour.”

She hung up and he started the car before driving off to the destination. 

He had taken precautionary measure by being as discreet as he could with his sunglasses and putting a cap on. The last thing he needed that day was being swarmed by fans he thought as he waited for Jenna inside the café. 

There were only a few customers and they seem to be minding their own business. 

A minute later, Peter saw Jenna enter the café. She saw him wave at her and approached the table he was seated at. A look of worry washed over her face as she took off her sunglasses. 

“Ok, so, you sounded… well, broken when you called me earlier. Please tell me…” she couldn’t bring herself to say it but he confirmed her suspicions with a nod. “Oh God, I…”

“Jenna,” he began, placing a hand on hers. “Calm down. Just let me explain what happened.”

A waiter suddenly appeared at their table. “Good morning, may I take your order?”

Peter immediately withdrew his hand and cleared his throat. “Yes, I’ll just have an orange juice.”

The waiter wrote down his order and then looked at Jenna. “And what about you, ma’am?”

“Same as him,” she replied. 

“Ok,” he waiter said as he scribbled down her order. “Won’t be long, now.”

Once they were alone again, Peter spoke. “Elaine found out what happened last night.”

Jenna furrowed her brows. “What do you mean she found out? I… we were alone, weren’t we?”

She was slowly beginning to panic. Had someone spotted them and reported to a news agency? Is that why she was here with Peter right now so he could tell just that? She realized that if Elaine had found out about it herself, then she must have felt all sorts of emotions. Poor Elaine. She had never meant any harm to her. 

She felt her heart skip a beat when he shook his head. They were about to be hounded by the media very soon. 

“Elaine has a friend who works at the Daily Mail and she sent a picture of us kissing. She was able to stall the publication for a day so that means, come tomorrow, the media is going to have a field day.”

Jenna just wanted the earth to swallow her at that very moment. She had not only caused a scandal but potentially ruined her best friend’s marriage as well. 

“And how did Elaine take it?” she asked and saw him grimace at the question. Not very well, clearly. 

Their orders came and Peter waited until the waiter disappeared. He took of sip of his drink. “She was furious and asked if we have been having an affair since series 9 and then kicked me out.”

Jenna nearly chocked on her drink as soon as her brain processed his words. “What?”

“Temporarily… I think.”

“Oh God, if I hadn’t kissed you… none of this would have happened,” she muttered, hiding her face in her hands. 

Peter stared at his wedding ring. It was mostly his fault. He wished that he could undo this whole mess but at the same time, he wasn’t remorseful about the kiss. “This is mostly my fault. If I had…”

“I understand. If we hadn’t kiss, you would still be at home right now.”

He shook his head. “No, that’s not what I meant.”

Jenna eyed him curiously. “Are you telling me you didn’t regret the kiss?”

“No,” he replied, twirling the wedding ring. “I don’t, Jen. I know, it’s pathetic for an old man like me to say that.”

She couldn’t believe the confession that came from him. She felt the same way and contemplated telling him too, to reassure him. She placed a hand on his to stop his fiddling.

“First, you’re not old. I’ve told you that hundreds of times. Second, I know I should but I don’t regret it either.”

He stared at her sadly, wishing that things could be different that he could be at least twenty years younger. “I’m sorry I got you into this mess, Jen.”

She squeezed his hand. “It takes two to tango. So what happens now? Where are you going to stay for the time being?”

Peter shrugged. “Returning to Cardiff is the only option I have.”

Jenna felt sorry for him. She would have offered him to stay at her home temporarily but he had warned her the media would be onto them tomorrow and if they ever caught him at her place, it would only add fuel to the fire. 

There was a lot more that needed to be discussed but right now, it just didn’t seem like the right time.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a slight continuity error in this chapter where I wrote that Peter could have already gone back to London. Apologies.   
> I've fixed it already.

They say that a picture paints a thousand words. A single picture could have a specific meaning for one individual and another for the next person. The argument is always open ended. Different strokes for different folks, they said.

Of course, sometimes, there is an exception to this rule. Well, several, actually. 

These exceptions were pictures of Jenna and Peter from the Doctor Who tour and photoshoots. 

Why were they considered as pictures with only a simple meaning? Because the photos said so – or at least that was what Jenna’s facial expression was screaming in ever single frame. 

After the media got a whiff of the scandal, all hell broke loose. They were not merciful in their hunt for the latest scoop. Some camped in front of Peter’s house in London, some at Jenna’s and some even went through the trouble to travel to Wales. Anything for a juicy story, especially a scandal. 

Naturally, after the Daily Mail published photos of Peter and Jenna kissing, other images began to surface, accompanied by ridiculous and outrageous titles, and in particular, ones from various photoshoots, filming location, etc. 

The look in Jenna’s eyes screamed adoration as she looked at Peter. All pictures said the same thing and it didn’t take a rocket scientist to see something so obvious. There was nothing but love in her eyes. 

Jenna had always thought she was good at hiding it, her feelings for him, let alone whenever she looks at him – she is an actor and it shouldn’t have been an issue but the photos proved her wrong. She couldn’t mask her feelings for him. 

Had she always glanced at him that way? Did he ever notice? 

That was when it hit her – she hadn’t heard from him in a week. This whole thing had broke out just a month ago and they had been in contact since he left for Wales until now that is. 

It was just like the old times aside from the fact that they were now dealing with a scandal. 

_“This is getting ridiculous. Some of them are still camped outside my flat,” Peter grumbled, holding his phone as he took a quick glance at the window and saw dozens of reporters waiting outside the apartment compound. ___

_“At least they’re not literally waiting just ten feet away from your door,” Jenna retorted. “It’s not like I’m going to say anything if I walk out of the house anyway.” ___

_“Then again, they’re the media, Jen. It’s what they do,” he walked back to the living room. “Anyway, aside from the paparazzi chasing you, how’s life?” ___

_It was best to change the subject rather than brooding about the current mess he was in. His question had earned him a chuckle. ___

_“Seriously, you’re asking me that? I’m sure you’re up to date. I phoned you yesterday, remember?” she giggled. ___

_“Ah yes, you were complaining about not being able to watch that new movie with your girlfriends.” ___

_“You make is sound as if it’s not a big deal. I recall you complaining about not being able to make a quick stop at Sainsbury’s yesterday,” she said playfully. ___

_He paused for a moment. “That’s different. It was an essential requirement.” ___

_“You do realize that you can simply order stuff online, right?” ___

_It was Peter’s turn to laugh. “Jenna, have you seen how I use a computer?” ___

_“Never too late to learn.” ___

The conversation on the phone had ended on a good note. She still found it ridiculous and funny that Peter didn’t know how to shop online. Jenna made a mental note to teach him how to do just that… if they ever meet again or if Elaine would even allow him to see her again. 

She glanced at her phone where she had been scrolling through the twitter feed earlier. 

It was full of news regarding the scandal. Everything from articles accusing Jenna of wrecking her former co-star’s marriage to more ridiculous stories of Peter and Elaine divorcing. 

If there was one thing she was sure of, it was that a divorce would very unlikely happen. She knew it would be a devastating blow for Peter and she couldn’t bear the thought of him going through such a thing. 

She contemplated about giving him a call or text to ask if he is alright. After all, she hadn’t heard anything from him for a week and she was starting to get worried… or maybe she was just being paranoid. He could be talking to his wife right all for all she knew. Might as well give him some space. 

Jenna nearly dropped her phone when it started ringing – it was Peter. He was calling her. She answered without a second thought. 

“Jenna Coleman. How may I help you?” she said playfully. 

“Yes, well, I do need assistance right now,” he replied in a serious tone, making her smile drop. 

She began to panic. “Peter, what happened?!”

There was a brief pause before he spoke. “How I do I shop on Sainsbury’s website?”

She was now gaping, unable to get words out of her mouth. “Seriously, Capaldi?! You had me worried for nothing!”

“Grocery shopping is a serious matter, Coleman.”

“Oh, shut up!” she giggled. She then cleared her throat. “Anyway, this is the first time you’ve called since a week ago so what’s up?”

This time, it was Peter’s turn to clear his throat. “I just wanted to know if you’re ok. It’s been crazy since the past month. How are you?”

She felt her stomach flipped. He was worried about her and the thought of it made her feel warm and fuzzy. It was a funny feeling. She had felt the same thing when they kissed.  
  
“I’m fine. Haven’t done much, really. I’ve been humouring myself with all the ridiculous rumours.”

“What kind of ridiculous rumours?” he sounded skeptical when he asked her. 

Jenna rose from the chair, deciding to sit on the sofa in the living room instead as it was much more comfortable than the wooden chair. She was sure Peter would be just as amused at some of the articles she came across. 

“There’s one where it says I’ve been sleeping with you,” she heard him let out a nervous chuckle before she continued. “And then some gossip magazine said you and I have been having an affair since series eight.”

This time, there was silence. The latter had hit closer to home with Peter. While the gossip magazine’s claim that they had an affair was false, he did develop feelings for her when they started working together. 

He didn’t bother going through the news and papers since the past few weeks. It was all too much for him. 

“Peter?” 

Jenna’s voice snapped him out of his train of thought. “Sorry, yes, where were we?”

“What were you thinking?”

“Nothing.”

She rolled her eyes. If there was one thing multi-talented Peter wasn’t good at, it was lying. He was too much of angel to lie successfully. “That wasn’t nothing. I could hear you think.”

He sighed in defeat. Jenna knew him too well. “I was thinking about what you said – the rumour.”

At this point, she was curious. She wanted to know more. 

“Well, it’s… just,” he gave up at trying to explain whatever he had thought of. “I don’t think talking about it over the phone is a good idea.”

Her heart skipped a beat. “It’s just you and me, Peter. We were best friends before this whole mess and I hope we still are… unless you’re not comfortable with it - that’s fine.”

He had wanted to tell her he was smitten with her the first time they met. Peter had seen her on Doctor Who before he was announced as the next Doctor and thought nothing of it but when he met her, it was as if he was in love all over again. He had thought it was ridiculous that a married man like him would be in love with someone much, much younger than him. 

It was the reason why he had made it clear he didn’t want romance for his Doctor – to avoid being infatuated with her. The plan proved to have failed terribly countless times. Him being in Wales instead of relaxing at home being the biggest proof. 

Would he ever pour his heart out to her without causing further damage?

“Maybe I will at some point,” he murmured. 

Jenna decided to quickly change the subject, hearing the same broken voice that she had heard when he was kicked out of the house. “So, have you and Elaine been talking?” 

If she could kick herself at that very moment, she would have. Her mouth had a mind of its own – no doubt. “Sorry,” she added hastily. “I didn’t mean-”

She was able to relax when she heard him laugh. A genuine laugh over her silliness. 

“We haven’t spoken since she kicked me out.”

Her heart sank. If only she could do something about it. “Did you at least send her a text or something?”

Peter hesitated a bit. He had wanted to at least send a text message to his wife but whenever he tried to do that, he was reminded that she needed space and time to think and so, he never did contact her. “No, I’m just giving her the space she needs.”

“It’s been a month. Maybe you ought to give her a call? Tell her you’re still alive and not rotting in the flat?” Jenna joked. 

“I will do that but not now.”

The truth was, he was terrified. He wasn’t sure if Elaine would allow him into the house after what he did, let alone talk to him.

“One month. She’s your wife,” it almost pained her to say it to the man she is in love with but she had to do what was right. “Call her. Fix whatever is wrong. You’re…” she had wanted to say he is sweet, loving and such a cinnamon roll but decided against it. “… Peter Capaldi.”

And that was exactly what he did after they had ended their conversation. He called Elaine, asked her if all is well. She had told him she was surprised it had taken him this long for him to contact her. 

Elaine had expected him to phone her a week after she had told him to leave but, no. It had taken longer. She had done a lot of thinking for the past month, especially after Jenna had texted her two days ago as she would like to meet her to tell Elaine her side of the story.

Elaine had told him he was welcomed back at home since they needed to have a serious conversation. She had been waiting for him to return home some three weeks ago but he never did. He didn’t even try to contact her until now.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is by far the most challenging chapter to write.  
> I just hope I got the dialogue right... along with everything else.

Elaine had been surprised one afternoon when she received a text message from the last person she had expected on earth. She had been waiting for Peter to call her for weeks but he never did and instead, she received the unexpected. 

For the past month, she had done a lot thinking – about Peter, their marriage, the scandal. Everything that had built up to present day and some thoughts were more painful than others but there was one question that kept popping up in her mind – does Peter still love her?

A part of her mind said it was a stupid question. Of course he does. He had told her so when she overreacted by kicking him out of the house. Why else would he say such a thing if he didn’t? But then, another part of her mind gave a counter argument. He loves her but not in the same way he loves Jenna. In short, his heart belongs to someone else now. 

It was an upsetting thought and she knew she should have said something to him when she first realized her husband was in love with his co-star but no, she chose to ignore it instead, believing her husband would not do anything rash but alas, in the end, he had kissed his former co-star. 

It only confirmed her suspicions that he was still very much in love with her despite not working together anymore or seeing each other as often. 

Does he still want to fix their marriage is the million dollar question. She knew he would say yes without hesitation. However, the damage has been done. It was strained for almost a year and to receive another blow as bad as the scandal, would they be able to repair it? 

For the past month Elaine had thought what would happen if she were to ask him to choose – saving their marriage or pursuing a relationship with Jenna. The sensible (or less sensible) part of her mind reasoned that her husband was in love with another woman and the feelings weren’t going to disappear anytime soon so why let everyone suffer?  
  
It was complex, difficult and painful. She loves Peter dearly but due to recent events, she couldn’t help but question everything. 

And then Jenna dropped the bomb by asking if she could meet somewhere and talk to her. 

It took a while for Elaine to reply and when she did, she had agreed to let her come over and discuss whatever it was she wanted to discuss. 

Jenna had asked if she could meet her to smooth things over, tell her, her side of the story. She felt responsible for what had transpired so she felt that it was only right for her to put in an effort and hopefully fix it somehow. 

She could have been selfish and convinced Peter to leave his wife but she wasn’t that type of woman. No. She would talk to Elaine, explain to her that it was all a mistake, an accident. That was the plan Jenna had in mind. 

It was simple. It sounded simple when she had thought about it but when one has to person the wife of the person you are caught in a scandal with, the idea of something being easy crumbled. The plan doesn’t always go according to plan. 

Nevertheless, the very next morning, Jenna drove to Peter’s house. She made sure to leave early as to avoid being seen by the paparazzi once they arrived sometime before noon, always waiting for something to happen. 

She parked by the driveway and sat in her car for a few minutes, nervous and anxious. She was about to confront Elaine and kept going through the plan in her mind. She had to stick to it even if it broke her heart. Jenna had to do it. For Peter’s sake at least. For his happiness. 

Jenna got out of the car and stood in front of the house. She straightened her back and walked towards the door before ringing the doorbell. 

A moment later, she was met face to face with Elaine, her facial expression neutral and it only made her even more nervous. 

“Come in,” she beckoned, moving aside to let Jenna in. 

“Would you like some tea?” she asked once they were settled in the living room. 

“Yes, tea would be good.”

Once Elaine disappeared into the kitchen, Jenna exhaled. She didn’t realize she had been holding her breath for a while. What was she thinking being here? While Elaine didn’t look cross, she couldn’t help but feel guilty for causing her misery. 

“The reason I came here is because…” Jenna began once Elaine returned from the kitchen with two cups of tea. “I want to tell you my side of the story.”

She took a seat in one of the chairs, opposite of Jenna, calm as ever. “Go on.”

“What happened that night on the rooftop was an accident. Peter and I, we didn’t plan on doing that. All we wanted to do was get some privacy,” she explained nervously. 

“Jenna,” Elaine interrupted gently. “There is no need for you to be nervous. I’m not cross.”

She swallowed the lump in her throat. “Right, it’s just that I don’t want you to blame all of this on Peter alone. He never meant any harm.”

“I want to believe you but there is more to this than the scandal,” Elaine said sadly. 

“What do you mean?”

She still had the same neutral expression she had earlier but this time, Jenna noticed something different – her eyes were watery. 

Elaine wasn’t blind. She had seen the photos circulating on the internet and newspapers. The papers on the kitchen table were left open on a particular page. She had been reading while waiting for her visitor and stopped when she saw photos of Peter and Jenna from the world tour. 

Her heart constricted when her eyes spotted a particular photo of the two looking at each other. She was on the verge of breaking down when the doorbell rang. 

“I know Peter loves you and I know you feel the same way,” Elaine murmured. “When you left the show, Peter… he wasn’t the same. He distanced himself.”

Jenna was speechless. She hadn’t known her departure had effected Peter in such a way. Sure, they have flirted every now and then but she didn’t realize how deep his feelings were for him until now.

She had wanted to ask him why he had kissed her and allowed her to kiss him but never got the chance to. She was so close at one point but he had brushed it away, telling her that it wouldn’t be right to do so on the phone. 

“Sometimes, I was convinced he was having an affair with you,” Elaine continued, blinking her eyes, trying to hold back tears. “He was always up in Wales, even when there was no filming.”

Jenna knew she wasn’t finished yet and choose to stay silent. It wasn’t like anything she could say now would make her feel any better – it could be worse for all she knew so being quiet was the best option. Elaine was telling her how husband was distancing himself from her and Jenna had to remind herself to stick to the plan. She had to. 

“And one day, Peter returned home. I thought that we were slowly fixing things. I do believe he tried,” she said sadly. “But, one night, in his sleep, he said your name.”

Jenna felt as if the breath had been knocked out of her. She was glad she hadn’t touched the cup of tea yet or else she would be spitting it out in surprise. Her eyes widened. 

“At that point I knew it was over.”

Elaine knew it was over but she wasn’t the type to give up easily. However, under the circumstances they were in, the saving the marriage was being put into question and it was a question she was terrified of asking.

It was Jenna’s turn to speak but she didn’t even know where to start. “I will not deny that I admire Peter. He is one of the nicest if not the nicest man I have ever met. You are very lucky to have him as your husband.”

If only things could have been different. If only she could have been older or he could have been younger, then she could have been the lucky one. If only. 

“We did not have an affair. Instead, I was under the impression he was perfectly happy.”

Elaine let out a sad laugh. 

“Peter loves you very much, Elaine.”

“I can say the same thing to you.”

The only difference is that it wasn’t Jenna’s place to love him. As much as she wanted to be with him, she couldn’t. “What happened on the rooftop was an accident. I was upset over my breakup with Richard and he comforted me.”

She had to say it. She had played it out in her mind over and over. All she had to do was say it. 

“The kiss was a mistake and as much as I admire Peter, I do not love him.”

Jenna couldn’t believe how easily the lie came out of her mouth. One moment she had trouble saying it and the next thing she knew was that she had shut her heart. 

“Please forgive him, Elaine,” was all she said, her voice almost cracked, before grabbing her bag and walking out of the house, tears prickling her eyes. 

Her confession had stunned Elaine that she wasn’t able to move until Jenna was gone. She sniffed and wiped her eye. She glanced at the window as she heard the sound of the car starting before it drove off. 

She knew what Jenna had said was a lie but the bigger question was, why did she lie? She had told her the marriage was over so why do such a thing? 

Later that evening, she received a phone call from Peter. A phone call Jenna encouraged Peter to make. He had asked her if she was ok, talked to her, apologised over what had happened. In the end, all Elaine had said to him was telling him to come home so they can discuss about their marriage. She was too exhausted, mentally and physically, to say anything else.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise Update!

Jenna didn’t even get the chance to get into her car before she started crying and she knew that the pain in her heart was only the tip of the iceberg. She was sure it was going to get worse by the time she reached home. 

She dried her tears and sniffed before starting the car and leaving the drive way as quickly as she could. The last thing she needed was being spotted. 

She had done what she had thought was the right thing but she couldn’t comprehend why it hurt so badly. To say that she didn’t love Peter was easy but then, she had realized what she had said. She was lying to herself as well. 

Once she reached home and entered her house, she broke down completely, sinking to the floor. 

Jenna couldn’t help but wish that Peter was with her, to comfort her, to tell her that everything was going to be alright but he wasn’t. It was wishful thinking. 

Eventually, she resigned to the kitchen to make some tea. That was when she spotted the morning paper lying innocently on the counter. She had thrown it there before leaving the house. 

The front page had pointed out an article about the scandal in one of the pages and Jenna skimmed over to the page. It was full of pictures of her and Peter. She felt tears stinging her eyes once more but she fought the urge to cry. She couldn’t be like this. She did the right thing and she should feel good about it. 

She convinced herself that she would move on and that it will all pass. 

Later in the afternoon, Jenna would receive a call from Peter, asking her about how online shopping works and she, being an actor, put on a mask, pretended that nothing bothered her. Instead, she had even advised him to call Elaine.

She was doing the right thing. The only problem was, it didn’t feel right. 

Peter had texted Elaine that he would return home in the early hours of morning to avoid bumping into the paparazzi, although most of them were gone after things had cooled down since the scandal but he wanted to be cautious. 

He couldn’t stop fidgeting in the car as he drove back to London. When he had phoned Elaine, she sounded different. He could hear the exhaustion in her voice and naturally, he felt worried. Even the conversation they had was short and quick. He did most of the talking and the only thing she had said was he could return home to discuss about their marriage. That was it. That was all she said before she hung up. 

If she was still cross with him, then she wouldn’t have answered his call or asked him to come home so that would mean something must have happened. She had plenty of time to think. Could it be that she had finally come to a conclusion? 

Peter reached London just after sunrise and when he parked his car on the porch, he let out a shaky breath. He wasn’t sure about anything anymore but he had to eventually face it all at some point and some point was now. 

When he had entered his home, it felt eerily quiet. Not a single sound was heard aside from him shutting the door. “Elaine?” he called out. 

A few seconds later, he heard her reply. “I’m upstairs.”

Peter didn’t even bother taking off his jacket. Instead, he walked up the staircase automatically when he heard her voice. He found his wife in their bedroom, sitting on the edge of the mattress, a photo album in her hands. 

Elaine looked up with glassy eyes. She had clearly been crying. Without a second thought, he was by her side, an arm draped around her before he kissed her head. 

Not a single word was uttered. They sat on the bed in silence. 

Elaine had come to a conclusion. A difficult one. 

“Are you alright?” Peter murmured. 

It took a moment for her to answer. “Yes, I was just going through some old photos.”

She had browsed through the album which contained photos of them in their younger years and at the end of the album, there was a page containing a single photo of their wedding. 

It made her think about her proposition again in the morning. Things had changed dramatically. It would never be the same. She knew that. He knew that. She still loves him but can’t bear the thought of staying with the man she loves while he is in love with another woman. It was too much for her. She had reached her limit. 

“Peter,” she said softly, caressing his hand. 

“Yes?”

“Can you tell me something truthfully?”

He swallowed the lump in his throat, unsure of where the conversation was going but he nodded in reply. A small part of him knew what she was going to ask and he was terrified of the consequences if he answered truthfully. 

Elaine look down at the closed photo album before she exhaled and said, “Do you love Jenna?”

He had two options, two choices. One, tell his wife the truth, say yes and get whatever is coming for him or two, tell her half the truth – say that he loves Jenna, convince his wife he could forget about her, that his love for her was nothing more than a stupid crush, a mid-life crisis thing. 

Peter had a choice to make. He loves Jenna but he also loves Elaine. He loved Elaine before Jenna. He loves them both but knows that he can never have everything. This is the moment he had been terrified of. He knew his wife would ask him such a question. 

But he couldn’t bring himself to answer her question. 

Elaine had taken his silence as a yes. Guilt was written all over his face. “I will take that as a yes,” she whispered sadly. 

He looked away in the other direction out of shame. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, voice hoarse. “I’m sorry for doing this to you, Elaine. You don’t deserve this.”

“Peter,” she said and reached for his hand. “Look at me, please,” she begged and he obeyed at last. “I love you very much, more than you will ever know but…”

It was difficult to say the words she kept repeating in her mind. So much more difficult and painful. 

Peter furrowed his brows. “What are you saying? Please, I know I’m not the best husband in the world-”

She shook her head, cutting him off and squeezed his hand. “What I wanted to say was, you are my every thing but to know your heart now belongs to someone else is something I can no longer bear.”

He stayed silent, waiting for her to continue. 

“I’m giving you a choice - you can stay with me and forget about her, or you could be with her.”

Her husband’s eyes widened in surprise over her suggestion. He didn’t except her to allow him to choose. He had expected her to tell him to forget about Jenna and they could go back to their normal lives but Elaine is a wise woman. 

“And before you make your decision, there is something else I have to tell you.”

All Peter wanted to do at that moment was sink into the floor, disappear away but he couldn’t. He had to face the consequences of his actions. “What is it?”

“Jenna came over yesterday. She was trying to convince me that there was nothing going on between you both. I believe her but I also believe that the two of you are in love with each other… However, she loves you so much that she lied to me and herself.”

“…I don’t understand.”

Elaine caressed the photo album with her thumb. “She thinks everything can be fixed by simply saying she didn’t love you.”

Silence fell once more and this time, all sorts of thoughts were going through Peter’s head. It made sense why she had encouraged him to phone Elaine. It made sense why she sounded a little too cheerful on the phone. Now it was his turn to make a decision. 

His wife’s words rang through his head over and over. He could no longer hide who he loves now and he knew which sensible choice to make but like she had told him, she could not bear the thought loving him while his heart was with someone else. 

He could have chosen to stay with Elaine to fix their marriage, to keep up the pretense that everything was fine but for how long? She knew the truth. The truth was an unpleasant one for her unfortunately. 

“I understand that it is a difficult decision to make – I will not be angry with you whichever option you choose but please, I can’t handle this anymore. It’s too much,” she said sadly, a small tear rolling down her cheek. 

Peter wiped the tear away with his thumb before he withdrew his hand. “I’m so sorry for all the misery I’ve caused you. I never wanted this to happen – if there is one thing I am sure of, it is that I love you. I always will. You are the reason why I’m able to be where I am today. You’ve brought me immense joy throughout my life and I am the luckiest man on earth to be loved by you.”

Elaine knew he had already made up his mind. She was just waiting for him to say it. She felt him grab both her hands. He held them ever so gently. “You can’t forget about her, can you?”

His eyes were now just as watery as hers. “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

She nodded, accepting his decision. He kissed both her hands. 

“You should go to her. When she had told me she didn’t love you, the look on her face was indescribable. I have never seen someone so heartbroken.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is not suitable for kiddiewinks.  
> You've been warned.

The drive to Jenna’s house felt like it was taking forever for Peter. It was as if time was slowing down. He had left his home feeling both sad and relieved. Sad that his marriage with Elaine was finally over. Thirty years of hard work and effort and life was gone. He had meant what he said to her. He always will love her. 

Regardless, he was also relieved. Relieved that he had finally faced the problem and come to a conclusion. It was a difficult one to make but in the end, he chose to follow his heart. 

When he finally reached Jenna’s residence, he didn’t immediately run to the door. He stayed in his car and contemplated on how to approach her. There were so many questions going on in his mind. In the end, he decided to simply walk up to the door and just go with the flow. 

He stood on the welcome mat, waiting for her after he had rang the doorbell.

Jenna had decided to stay in bed all day after her meeting with Elaine the previous day. She was too upset to be bothered to even move. Upset and heartbroken. It was very likely she would never see Peter again since it was for the best and the thought pained her.

Her phone had been ringing for the past ten minutes – calls and text messages from her agent, friends and family. All of which were ignored. She didn’t feel like talking to anybody at the moment. 

She kept wishing that things were different, then maybe she wouldn’t be an emotional mess right now. Peter was probably back with Elaine and she was happy for him. She was, but it was at the cost of her own happiness. 

Jenna rolled over in bed and closed her eyes, trying to prevent herself from crying. She had been crying so much since yesterday that it was giving her a headache. 

Suddenly, the sound of the doorbell resounded in her house. She groaned. Whoever it was could sod off. She wasn’t in the mood to socialise. After about two minutes, she heard the sound again. 

Whoever it was, was determined to see her for whatever reason and she had considered putting on a robe and going downstairs. The sound of the doorbell was heard for the third time and Jenna sighed. 

The person is going to get a piece of her mind. She grabbed her robe, put it on and headed downstairs. She then heard her phone ringing upstairs just a fraction of a second before she swung the door open. 

Jenna was greeted by the sight of the last person she had expected to see. He had his phone to his ear – definitely the person calling her. The image of him took her breath away. He was dressed casually, dark brown jacket, white shirt, black jeans and his curly silver hair tousled as ever. 

She, on the other hand, was in her bathrobe.

Peter pocketed his phone and cleared his throat, snapping her out of her daydreaming. 

“Peter?” she said, almost in a whisper. “What… what are you doing here?”

He licked his lips. “Can I come in?”

“Yes, of course!” she then stepped aside to let him enter before shutting the door firmly. 

“I… went home today and talked to Elaine,” he started, hiding his hands in the pockets of his jeans. 

Jenna was lost for words. She didn’t understand why he was at her place and not at home with his wife. “Ok, did something happen?”

His eyebrows shot up and he scratched the back of his neck. “I suppose you can say that. She told me you came over yesterday.”

He didn’t expect to get so nervous but he was. His mind was replaying what Elaine had told him and what Jenna had said to a large crowd at comic con just before series 9 premiered. 

A look of sorrow washed over her face. “I had to do what was right. You have been married for thirty years – I didn’t want to ruin that.”

He stood in front of her now. “Did you really mean it? That you didn’t love me? I need to know,” he said softly.

Sadness flashed in her eyes. “I won’t let your marriage crumble because of me and it’s not my place to love you. It’s too complicated. Us. I wish…”

He grabbed her hand, caressing it with his thumb. “Jenna, please tell me, did you really mean what you said at comic con? That you love me? Please.”

She looked into his eyes. “Please, Peter. Don’t do this to me.”

He didn’t stop caressing her hand as he spoke. “Elaine gave me a choice – either you or her. I didn’t need to say anything and she knew my answer. She couldn’t bear the thought of loving someone who loves another person.”

Jenna's eyes widened. “Are you telling me you left your wife?”

“You make it sound like I’m a terrible person but yes, it was a mutual agreement.”

Her mouth fell open. She couldn’t believe what she had heard. 

“Now, please, tell me what you said is true.”

She felt as if a burden had been lifted from her shoulders. The sadness was gone and replaced with happiness. “Yes, yes, I love you! I love you, Peter!” she exclaimed and was on the verge of crying. 

He flashed her a smile before he bent down and captured her lips. It was passionate and hungry. She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought him closer to her, their bodies now pressed against one another. 

They pulled away when they ran out of breath, both beaming at each other. 

Peter kissed her again and twirled her around in his arms. 

“I love you,” she whispered as she captured his lips, her hands trying to remove his jacket. 

He found the fastenings of the robe and untied it, causing it to fall to the floor in a puddle. He then worked on the removing the over-sized worn out TARDIS t-shirt she was wearing. 

“Peter,” she moaned between kisses, unbuttoning his shirt. “Upstairs.”

He broke the kiss and carried her in his arms, causing her to shriek at suddenly being lifted from the ground. 

“Ah, you’re showing off after spending time at the gym, aren’t you?” she joked, placing her head against his chest. 

He merely laughed at her teasing, carrying her up the stairs to the master bedroom. 

Pushing the door open with his foot, he kissed her once more before gently laying her on the bed and climbed on top of her. “I like your TARDIS t-shirt,” he complimented, causing her to giggle.

“You’re more than welcome to take it off,” Jenna replied, winking at him as her arms wrapped once more around his neck, playing with his hair. 

He leaned in and kissed her. His hands were now working to undress her. She on the other hand, was trying to unfasten his belt but Peter’s roaming hands were making it difficult for her to concentrate. 

She had fantasised about his hands more than once, especially during interviews. They were expressive. She always wondered what it was like to have those hands on her body and now, her fantasy was coming true. 

He had successfully taken off her t-shirt and wasted to time caressing her breasts. His crotch was pressed against her thigh and she could tell he was already hard. 

Jenna let out a moan when his tongue made contact with her skin. “Peter…”

She managed to undo the buckle of his belt and unzipped his pants. Peter wriggled out of his jeans before kicking them away, leaving him in his boxers only. 

One of his hands played with her breast while the other hand traced circles lightly on her wet knickers, teasing her. He pulled them off in one go before inserting a finger into her, enjoying the reaction he was getting. He inserted another, causing her to moan in pleasure. 

“Jenna,” he moaned when she tried to peel off his underwear. 

Once his boxers were off, she gripped his leaking manhood. A moan of approval resounded from his throat. 

“I need you,” she whispered. “I need you.”

He couldn’t take it much longer either. The thought of him being inside her turned him on even more. 

In one swift movement, he entered her. She clawed his back as he began thrusting into her. She was wet and tight and the feeling was enough to drive him mad. One particular thrust made her yell out his name and he could feel his back stinging a bit from how hard her fingers dug into his back. 

He was close to coming but all that mattered to him at that moment was Jenna. He decided to prolong the experience by slowing down a bit, enough to have her groan, pulling out and thrusting back in. He nipped Jenna’s ear, whispering her name as they moved together. 

Her muscles clenched him and a wave of pleasure shot through her whole body. Peter thrust into her a couple of time before his orgasm came and he spilled inside of her. 

The next thing he knew, he was on top of her, head on her chest, panting heavily. The sound that could be heard was the sound of their breathing. He closed his eyes when he felt her hand caressing his hair, savouring her touch. 

Eventually, he rolled over to get into a more comfortable position and she snuggled into his arms, feeling content. 

The silence was suddenly broken when Jenna let out a chuckle. 

“What’s so funny?” asked Peter, trailing a finger down her spine. 

“Nothing, it’s just, a couple of hours ago, I thought I had lost you forever, as a friend.”

He kissed her forehead as reassurance. “Well, I am here, aren’t I? Lying in bed with you.”

She beamed at him, intertwining her hand with his. “Yeah.”

He was hers. She couldn’t believe it. The man she loves and couldn’t have is hers. It made her feel butterflies in her stomach. 

“I love you,” she heard him whisper after they had made love later that night. 

It made her heart soar. It didn’t matter what the world thought of them. They were happy. They love each other. And for them, it was enough. The rest didn’t matter.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue

**Three Years Later… ******

_“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the world premiere of Moriarty! I’m Andrew Taylor and I will be your host for this evening, here at Leicester Square.” ___

Leicester Square was packed, full of people and cameras in every corner. Fans were lined up behind the barriers, waiting for the stars to arrive.

A large red carpet was laid out on the pavement, leading to the entrance of the Odeon theatre where the film will be shown. A film that starred a certain Doctor. A film that focused on Sherlock Holmes’ nemesis, Professor Moriarty before the Mathematician crossed paths with the detective.

Peter left Doctor Who after the 12th series. He had the time of his life playing the Doctor and when the time came, he had decided to pass the torch. When it was time to leave, it was time to leave. And then one day, he was approached by a producer to play Professor Moriarty. After reading the script and with Jenna’s support, he agreed. 

The public in general were excited over the announcement of the film as they were eager to see what Moriarty’s life was like before The Final Problem. 

And now, everyone was waiting for the stars to arrive, to walk on the red carpet. 

“Are you alright? You look a little pale,” Peter said Jenna, who was seated next to him in the back of a black SUV as it drove through the streets of London, on its way to Leicester Square. 

“I’m fine,” she assured him, beaming and grabbing his hand. “I mean, I can’t throw up as much as I did this morning!” she joked but he still had a serious face on. “That was a joke!”

He couldn’t help but smile and brought her hand to his lips. “That was a terrible joke, then but really, if you are unwell, tell me. We can just go home.”

“Peter, this is your big night! I’m not going to ruin it just because I feel a bit off.”

He shook his head. “Your health is a priority and besides, this whole premiere thing is bigger than anything Doctor Who has to offer. It makes me feel nervous.”

Jenna chuckled. “Silly man, you weren’t this nervous when were in New York.”

“That was different,” Peter rolled his eyes. “It wasn’t being broadcast live all over the world. It was a smaller event compared to this.”

“Speaking of the premiere, we’re here,” she murmured, looking through the tinted windows. 

The car came to a halt right next to the red carpet but they didn’t leave the vehicle just yet. They were allowed to leave when one of the guards opened the door. 

Peter felt excited and nervous at the same time. Sure, he had been to many events but this was a completely different thing. He felt Jenna place a hand on his arm, beaming again at him. 

“You’ll be fine,” she whispered and gave him a quick peck on the lips, moments before the door swung open.

_“Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve been expecting him, it’s Professor Moriarty himself, Peter Capaldi!” ___

Flashes were going off as he stepped out of the SUV before he helped Jenna out of the car and the screaming increased in volume.

She wrapped her arm around his and together, they walked on the red carpet. She could hear the fans screaming their names, smiling at them as they held their phones in her hands. 

They were required to stand in front of the cameras for a few moments and some of the reporters were throwing questions at them.

“Peter, Jenna, is it true you are pregnant? You were spotted leaving St Mary’s Hospital last week.”

“Peter, is it true that you proposed to Jenna on the set of the film?”

Neither Peter nor Jenna said a word. Instead, their smiles grew bigger.

He had proposed to her the day after filming had wrapped up, which was about a year ago. She had been surprised when he got on one knee as she going through the script for the new season of Victoria. 

The proposal had taken her by surprise and it made her cry happy tears as she said yes. 

They got married just five months ago. It was a small wedding attended by close friends and family. A wedding that the media had been dying to get a scoop on but never did. However, Jenna couldn’t help but post a picture on her Instagram. It was a picture of the wedding cake. A wedding cake that had the TARDIS on top. One door open as the groom dragged the bride into the TARDIS. 

And then, she had suspected something was wrong one morning. Well, just the previous week to be precise. Peter started panicking when he saw her rush to the bathroom, hand covering her mouth. She spent all morning by the toilet. It didn’t calm his nerves.

By noon, he took her to the hospital. 

The couple then headed in the direction of where the host stood as Peter had told her that before they enter the theatre, he would have to be interviewed by the host for less than five minutes. Of course, she had told him she didn’t mind.

“Here I have next to me is Peter Capaldi himself,” the host said as he faced the camera, mic in hand. “Now, Peter, tell me in three words what the film is all about.”

“Three words?” Peter repeated with an amused tone, wracking his brain. “Uh, I’d say, clever, dramatic and Maths! Lots of that!”

Jenna laughed silently in the background as she waited for her husband to finish his interview. Once Peter did, he ran back to her and held his wife’s hand in his as they entered the theatre for the premiere of the film. 

They sat through the film and she couldn’t have been prouder of him. She thought his acting was as spectacular as ever. It made her heart swell with pride. 

Halfway through the screening, Peter discreetly caressed her hand before he placed his on her belly, smiling at her. Jenna set her hand on top of his.

_“I believe congratulations are in order, Mr and Mrs Capaldi. It would seem, Jenna, you are indeed, pregnant. A little over a month, actually,” the doctor, Dr. Aidras said kindly as she held the piece of paper containing the result in her hand. ___

_Peter’s eyes widened before his facial expression changed to that of happiness. He beamed at his wife as she held the same expression. “That’s wonderful! Fantastic, actually!”_

__Jenna couldn’t believe how their life had turned out. She has Peter with her and now they are having a child. She couldn’t wish for a happier life._ _

__Peter was just as elated. He had thought things couldn’t get any better after marrying Jenna and he was proven wrong by the happy news._ _

__“Jen,” Jenna heard Peter whisper. “What do you say we go to the rooftop after the film?”_ _

____

**The End ******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I certainly had a blast writing this story (then again, I say that in all my notes. Hehe). 
> 
> Thank you so much if you've come this far. Your support, comments and kudos are greatly valued. 
> 
> Also, am I the only one who thinks Peter Capaldi would be great as Professor Moriarty? :D
> 
> I hope you had a wonderful time reading this RPF.


End file.
